There are lots of minutes in motherhood that I don't love. But there are many more minutes that are priceless.
Every Mother's Day, I make a point of having Jared take photos of me and the kids. I don't have many photos with my mom and I wish I had more. And in our family, I'm usually the one behind the camera. I want my kids to remember how I looked and how I looked at them and how they looked at me.
I want to remember how Silas is looking up at me with his sweet adoring look in this photo and how Oliver closes his eyes like this when he goes in for a hug. I want to remember how Ashton is gaining on me height-wise every day and how his hugs may be few and far between but they're like gold. I want to remember Isaac's tight-around-the-waist hugs. And I want to remember this time when they all want to be near me and all want my attention at the same time and all still think I know quite a lot.
Motherhood is hard. The hardest work I've ever done by far. But it's also the sweetest and most rewarding and beautiful work. I thank God every day for these precious children he entrusted me with and for all that they teach me through the hard stuff and the good stuff.
Sometimes I get scared for all that is to come. I hear of friends and relatives dealing with everything from a child being hit by a car to a child making serious mistakes that are hard to fix and my heart fills with empathy while my brain registers fear for the future. I want to hold these sweet children close and teach them all I can and be there for all the things they want to tell me and show me during this precious time that I'm still close to the center of their world.
I want to take them each on mommy dates most weeks and really listen to them. I took Oliver on a walk on Sunday and let him be the leader and show me everything he wanted to show me - he doesn't get to be the leader much and he had so much to show and tell. I took Silas to the store yesterday - just me and him - and he picked out all the veggies and pushed the cart and ate up the whole experience. I took Isaac running with me yesterday and found out that he's not much of a jogger but he sure is amazing at noticing the beauty of the world around us.
I want to take a break from whatever important projects I've got going on Power of Moms to watch the little plays Eliza's always putting on with the twins - they always have to wait too long for me to come watch. I want to take the time to have Ashton show me how his MindStorm works and his latest favorite music.
I want to be there to see their eyes shine so my eyes can shine back at them. And I've been too busy and consumed lately.
So some of my other stuff will just have to slow down a bit. And that's OK. The precious moments of this stage of motherhood have to be appreciated NOW, the foundation of relationships that we all need to get through this life successfully have to be built NOW. Everything else can wait.
Oh I couldn't agree more--I feel like I've run on auto-pilot for the last several months, and yesterday felt so glorious just sitting outside watching my kids ride bikes and play with no deadlines or 'important stuff' looming.
ReplyDelete(Your photos are beautiful, my Mother's Day ones didn't quite work out so well, maybe it's because I have a two year old...)
Love these photos, you look radiant!!
ReplyDeleteBeautiful post. And I love all those pictures of you with your kids! You're a great Mom Saren. Thanks for reminding us to put "things" down and be in the moment.
ReplyDeleteI LOVE that you LOVE momming! You are so terrific at everything you do...but especially that! I have to say kudos to the photographer Jared! Great pictures. That old house provides some fantastic lighting!
ReplyDeleteSo beautiful! Your kids are so adorable. I will have to post those videos of my kids singing Tangled songs with your kids doing some awesome backup dancing:) Isaac was so cute playing with Kaleigh!
ReplyDeleteSo cute, Sar.
ReplyDeleteGorgeous photos Saren! I hope you frame one or two of them! I love summer because even though it might not slow down, the commitments are all MINE to make (and break!)
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