Bad Tooth Fairy

We have a very very very slow tooth fairy. Several kids have been sleeping with several teeth under their pillows for months - and some of those teeth have ended up being forgotten or lost over time. It's been so long since the tooth fairy has shown up that the kids have sort of stopped asking about her. But Silas lost another tooth the other day and as he slipped it under his pillow that night, he shrugged and said, "Do you think maybe the tooth fairy died?" I had to report that question to the tooth fairy. And somehow she pulled herself together and made a real point of getting to our house that very night.

Here's what she found in an envelope under Isaac's bed:

She left each child a decent stack of money including some exciting gold dollar coins and explained her lateness. The kids were very forgiving. And Isaac didn't ask about what she meant by circling both the yes and the no on his note. He just decided to leave it alone and be happy for his money.

Here's the note she left:

Dear Kids:
I know, I know, I know, I'm terribly late. I was trying out a new system where I visit each part of the world systematically rather than flitting in all different directions every night to collect teeth. So I've spent about a month in China, another month in India, then Europe took a month too and I've been working my way across the country to get to you. There sure are a lot of kids loosing teeth! It's so much more efficient for me to collect teeth this way and I do a better job not missing anyone. I hope you'll understand! 

I've given you a little extra money for your teeth plus I've decided to let you keep your teeth since some of you expressed interest in that. I know how special teeth can be. And frankly, I've got plenty of teeth right now.

Take care of those gorgeous huge permanent teeth you're getting. As a tooth conneseiur, I have to say you've got some of the largest, strongest, most lovely permanent teeth I've seen in all my travels. Sure, you may need some braces but those Eyre teeth that you and all your Eyre cousins have are special - cherish them!

love, T.F.

I think we're entering a whole new phase where our kids want to believe but it's not seeming all that logical to believe but they've decided to go ahead and believe anyway because it's fun. I'm good with that.

airplanes, bikes, great food - and moms

Gratitude Day 17: Airplanes

Thursday I flew to Arizona for a Power of Moms Retreat. I hopped on a plane in freezing Salt Lake City and got off just an hour and a half later in sunny Phoenix. How awesome is it that we can get on a plane in one place and show up somewhere far far away just a little bit later? Yes, security is a big pain (juggling your shoes while extracting your lap top and digging out all the liquids in your toiletries is not exactly fun) and sure, packed planes can be rather uncomfortable. And yep, it's a bit annoying that airlines now charge for everything - checking luggage, food, etc.  But you know what? Airplanes are quite miraculous and are a huge blessing.

Gratitude Day 18: Bikes and Warm Weather

It is warm here.  It is gorgeously perfectly warm here. I miss warmness. And I miss my bike. So when Shawni's daughter Grace left her bike at school and we needed to go pick it up, I volunteered to ride it home. Sure, it was a little small for me and it's pink and has a cute basket on the front. But I felt like a bike ride and wanted that outside time.

I was totally laughing at myself as I wrote that little pink bike. And I had a lot of little kids and serious bikers give me some very curious and surprised looks. I took the long way to Shawni's house and enjoyed every minute of my ride. Plus I got a great thigh work out because that seat was so low.

Sometimes doing something pretty darn odd-looking is just fun. It totally reminded me of the time I had to ride a super-slow "Jazzy" scooter into Costco and got some similar quizzical looks. Check out this post about that thrill ride here if you want.

Gratitude Day 19: Awesome moms and wonderful free food

Our Retreat today was wonderful. Totally wonderful. There are such great moms in this world - and I love seeing how they help and lift and learn from each other. I learn a lot at every single Retreat from fellow presenters and attendees and always wish I had longer to bask in the presence and ideas of the great women who attend. It was wonderful presenting with Shawni and with April and I loved having great speakers from American Mothers as well plus Shawni's friend Nichole who was not only a great speaker but also a fabulous and amazingly helpful hostess.

I'm also so grateful to Wildflower Bread Company for sponsoring our lunch at the Retreat. They were SO kind. We just asked for a discounted lunch as a partial sponsorship to help defray our costs but they decided to GIVE us a whole beautiful lunch of seriously delicious sandwiches, salads, drinks and desserts. It was just the nicest thing. And it was the most lovely and tasty lunch we've ever had at a Retreat. I just wish I'd had more time to eat - I was too busy talking.

I'll post photos and more info later but I had to just say this for now before I collapse. It's been a long, full and wonderful couple of days!

What are you grateful for today?

Today's Totals

You do the math:

1 sick kid home from school (aches and pains - nothing specific - he might have just needed some extra TLC from me - so I tried to give it to him.  Nice to have him around all day.  We had a nice lunch together and we watched a beautiful storm and saw a bright rainbow together - he and I are special fans of rainbows so it was extra wonderful to see this one together.

+ 2 super excited twins when they came home from school and found the UPS truck had delivered the transformers they've been working hard to earn over the past month.  It was seriously better than Christmas morning around here!  Definitely a high point of the day for all of us.

+ 3 new Power of Moms website pages created including two new Retreat pages (along with plenty of phone calls and emails to firm up details)

+ 4 crazy cub scouts performing wild antics while we were supposed to be learning about different instruments and about developing talents from kind members of the high school marking band - there were fart noises, a new kid using some swear words and pulling down his pants for the sheer fun of it, kids running up and down the bleachers, kids needing to go to the bathroom and get drinks... (I've had plenty of big-deal roles in church and community organizations and have taught groups of homeless kids, inner city kids, spoiled rich kids, you name it - but I have to say this small group of scouts that I agreed to lead gives me a run for my money like nothing else has - wow!)

+ 5 kids with mutually exclusive needs during after-school crunch time and scout-reminder phone calls.  One child needed help with homework - while another one desperately wanted me to watch the dance she and the neighbor girls made up - while one was in tears over a tricky part of transforming his new transformer - while one wanted me to make everyone else be totally quiet because he kept losing count of the tickets from the school carnival that he promised to count so we could figure out what revenue different booths brought in - while one needed me to come see if his room was sufficiently clean and check whether the proposal he'd written for how he was going to KEEP his room clean(er) was good enough to win him the right to sleep in his own room again (it wasn't).  This dear child has been sleeping in the scary basement for the past few nights to follow through on a threat that if he couldn't keep his room at least pretty decent and be a better influence on his little brother that he shares a room with, he'd have to sleep in the basement...

+ 6 times that the other kids got out of bed while I went on a tour of a newly clean room and helped finalize the room cleanliness proposal.  He passed.  He's sleeping in his own bed tonight.

+ 7 kids I had to pick up at school in different areas - the elementary school has this crazy new pick-up procedure where all the kids line up with their teachers after school and you have to go to each class to gather up all the different kids you need to drive home. After gathering 5 kids at the elementary school, I get to fish around the big boys' school until I can spot them.  Somehow it's a challenge for them to wait in the same place each day...

+ 8 hugs as I tucked in my sweet, cute kids (Some kids wanted more than one hug during the first tuck-in - that's why the 8. The hugs dried up when they kept getting out of bed!)

+ 9 times (at least) that I counted my blessings that my wonderful husband is usually around to help with some of the madness.  We're all missing daddy/Jared a lot around here!

+ 10 times I woke up last night with my throat hurting or with a worry about something or other - one of those weird nights...

+ 78 emails I received and fielded (lots archived, lots filed away, many replied to, a couple really nice ones about how much POM means to them - those always make me happy...)

= ONE TIRED BUT GRATEFUL MOM!

Grocery Store Adventures

So the kids and I have been having fun making these little Deliberate Mothering Tip videos. It's been a good way to get us going on routines that got pretty slack over the summer.

Week before last, the twins, Liza and I made this video about what we do (usually) before heading into the grocery store:




Doesn't that look like a nice, organized way to get ready to head into the store?

Well, let me tell you about yesterday's grocery store run. The twins and I had our little "grocery store rules" review before heading in. We were going to have a lovely little "mommy date" together and they were going to pick out a nice treat at the end.

Here's what actually happened.  The twins begged to push the shopping cart and I agreed, provided that they could trade off pushing it nicely and stay right by me.  That lasted for about 10 minutes. Then they started fighting over whose turn it was to push the cart - verbally fighting and then pushing and shoving. I took over pushing the cart. They cried. I got them interested in finding the peaches. They wanted to help put the peaches in the bag which seemed like a fine idea but they kept trying to put unripe or overripe peaches in the bag and were having a hard time with the concept of putting them gently in the bag.

We moved on. As I contemplated how much of certain things I should buy, they thought it would be fun for one of them to push the cart while the other one dragged along behind - sort of like water skiing behind the cart.  They were staying close to me so that was sort of OK. But then they got going a bit too fast and ran into another cart.  The lady pushing that cart wasn't amused.  Neither was I.

We headed to the bulk foods where they were excited to put on disposable plastic gloves and help me grab spaghetti from the bulk bin. Then as I thought about which cereal to buy, they started crab walking, delighting in the idea that their hands would stay clean thanks to the gloves but finding, much to my dismay, that backwards crab-walking results in more collisions.

We had a few more mishaps.  A milk jug got tossed in the cart on top of the bananas.  We had a near tip-over of the cart when both twins decided to hop on one side at the same time - but they profusely apologized for breaking the rule they well know about not hanging on the side of the cart.  I quickly got the most necessary items and we somehow made it out of the store without causing too much damage to ourselves, our food or anyone or anything else.

I was proud of myself for being pretty patient through the whole thing. I did declare a time out where the boys had to sit on the floor on their hands and count to 20 while I looked for the shampoo I needed. That calmed them down for a while. And I did get pretty stern with them.  They're usually pretty good in the store - especially when we remember to go over the rules before we head in.  But sometimes, even the best laid plans don't quite work out.

So I guess I'm just saying organization, routines and planning are not guarantees (as evidenced by this post). But they sure do help.  I hate to think how bad our grocery store trip would have been without setting up some rules at the beginning!

P.S.  We're trying to get a bunch more Deliberate Mothering Video tips turned in by THIS FRIDAY, Sept 16th.  I bet you've got some great little methods you've developed that would work well for other families as well. Try making a video with your kids and send it in!  It really is a fun activity to do with your kids and seriously takes about 10 minutes.  Plus, the kids seem to be pretty good at practicing what they've preached after making a video.  Instructions for submitting videos are HERE.

Enjoying

Now that the website is launched, we're dealing with plenty of little glitches and fixes but in general, life seems SO much less stressful!  I've had a few melt-downs in the past couple weeks when all I did was work on the computer and quickly meet my kids needs in a fairly basic way while finishing so so so many things on the website.  But the hard work seems to be paying off and life feels so much better now. My new goal each day is to enjoy.  To do what I can do in some specified hours each day and just enjoy the rest.  And with dance and scouts cancelled this week for reasons I don't even know and basketball season over for the boys, life really seems slower and nicer on all fronts!

Jared, the twins and I went to the school to see Eliza and Isaac receive awards this morning.  I loved seeing their proud grins as they stood up there with their certificates and felt so happy to hear the nice things their teachers said about them (especially since we've experienced some real struggles with school here and there).  We've got good kids.  The assembly was long, long, long - and not exactly thrilling other than the parts my kids were in. Sitting there for so long with the website waiting would have driven me crazy in the last few weeks.  But today I just sat back and enjoyed (and replied to just a couple emails on my phone...).

I made bread yesterday.  And it was really good bread.  We had bread and milk for dinner with a few carrots on the side - bread hot thick with honey and butter.  Everyone was so happy.  My mom used to make bread sometimes and when we'd come home to a house full of that fresh-bread smell, we were in heaven.  So I've tried to do the same for my kids over the years and have valiantly failed - brick bread is what we all affectionately called my attempts.  But then my sister taught me to make bread at Bear Lake last summer and I've made some pretty darn good batches this year.  Still, it's a process - a messy, longish process.  It felt so good yesterday to just take the time to make bread and let the twins knead it and not stress about the time it took to clean up.  It felt good to go the extra mile and clean behind the canisters and wipe down the backsplash and just do those little things you notice and can do something about when you're not feeling stressed and rushed.

I took a somewhat leisurely trip to the grocery store today with Oliver and Silas (it's been a mad dash for bare essentials for quite some time now) and had them help me think of some good meals for this week (the meals haven't been stellar lately).  As the boys were helping me pick out fruits and veggies.  I asked Silas if he thought we should get some squash and he said "noooooo - really no squash!"  (They love just about every kind of vegetable - Oliver requested broccoli and green beans for his birthday dinner - but somehow squash, the favorite baby food for all my kids, has ended up on the gag list for most of them!)  After turning down the squash so vehemently, Silas went over to Oliver who was a little further down the aisle and said "Oliver, guess what.  We almost had a squash situation.  But I told mommy no."

These boys crack me up and I need to remember more of what they say!  They use a lot of big words lately - and use them correctly.  It sounds so cute with their little voices.

Tonight we went to a really cool hands-on science exhibit at the old train station downtown.  The kids were so excited to learn about sound waves and static electricity (some of those shocks really hurt!) and optical illusions and all sorts of interesting stuff.  Some of it was a little over the twins' heads so we wandered out into the big old train station waiting room - cavernous place with beautiful murals commemorating the completion of the railroad.  The place feels so empty now that its purpose is long gone.  I wish the new double decker trains that connect Salt Lake and Ogden pulled right up to this old station so it could bustle and be used as it was meant to be used.  Oh well.

Anyway, they had those machines where you can turn a penny into a souvenir there in the old waiting room and Oliver and Silas begged to create their own special pennies.  I always say no about this sort of stuff.  With 5 kids and usually some friends along for good measure, I never have enough quarters or time or patience it seems.  But when I found the right number of quarters in my wallet for my two boys to make their smashed pennies, they got the hugest smiles of glee and amazement on their faces!  We made awesome souvenir pennies and they were soooooo happy.

When I had tucked Oliver in bed last night, he started crying and said "I hate Ogden!"  I hugged him and asked why and after a while he came up with "because I don't get to do fun things here."   After a weekend of skiing and a trip to the children's museum last week with cousins, that hardly seemed fair.  I told him I know there are lots of fun things we used to do in St George and that I miss it too but that there are different really fun things to do here.  We talked about the fun things we've done lately and the fun things we have coming up and he went to sleep happier - he was just overtired I think.

So tonight when I tucked him in (after he'd carefully stashed his special penny in the bottom of his jammie drawer in the special wallet Ashton made for him out of duct tape, Oliver said, "you know that thing I said last night about Odgen?  Well now that I have my penny that says Ogden, Utah on the back I feel much better."  I'm so glad.

Sure there were bad moments today - like when one child brought home a report card with some stuff on it that does not reflect his abilities and we had to have a big talk.  Or when all the kids were being super loud and talking to me at once and I was so tired since I didn't sleep well last night.  Or when Jared and I went out for a lunch date to celebrate getting the website done and it wasn't very fun because we weren't used to talking about anything other than the website.  Or when Oliver and Silas disappeared in the grocery store for a couple minutes - I swear I've lost a few years from my life thanks to worry over wandering kids.

But I choose not to focus on the bad parts of today.  I have melt-downs and stressed-out moments more than I should.  I worry too much.  I work too much.  I do too much.  I think too much.  I enjoy too little.  And I mean to change that.

Don't get Cocky

I like this quote - can't remember who said it or where I heard it, but it stuck with me:
"As soon as you get a little cocky about your mothering, the principal will call and let you know that your son just drove a motorcycle through the gymnasium."

Sort of weird, yes - but it sticks with you, no?

I was a little cocky in my last post about routines.  I did do a good job getting the routines rolling and I was enjoying a good day that day.  But here's how our "routine" went this morning:

I got up 10 minutes late.  I used the snooze button on my new phone - thought it was a 5 minute snooze - nope - ten.  I dragged myself out of bed and headed upstairs to make sure the kids were up and going on the good old routine.

Nope.  Ashton was reading a book instead of taking a shower and the rest of the kids were asleep.

I sent Ashton into the shower and got the other kids up.  But I'd been tired the night before and forgot to set out their clothes - or go over what the schedule and routine was for the morning.  Ashton had no school shirts that could be found anywhere.  Isaac got dressed quickly and headed downstairs - I asked him to set out the bowls and make sure his homework was ready in his backpack.  I got the twins going on getting dressed and got myself ready.

Time for breakfast - just 10 minutes late - we'll still be OK.  I realized Ashton was still in the shower and headed upstairs to ask him nicely - again - to HURRY.  On the way back down I heard another shower and found that Eliza had decided to take a shower too even though it's not her shower day so I asked her to HURRY.

Got downstairs to find Isaac wandering around aimlessly, no bowls on the table, no homework ready - what had he been doing for the last precious 10 minutes?  He had no idea.

Got oatmeal whipped up and sat down to eat.  Ashton finally came downstairs demanding that I find him some shorts to wear for gym that day and that they needed to be shorts that went past his knees.  I explained that needs for things like new gym shorts should really be stated in advance of when you actually need them.  We have shorts that go to the middle of his knee but he said they would be too short.  I searched through his stuff and handed him the longest shorts I could find and asked him to put them in his backpack.

I finished everyone's hair, checked all the backpacks, reminded everyone to clear their places (somehow it's SO hard to remember), asked whoever was guilty - and I don't even care who - to PLEASE go flush the poo down the toilet in the powder room right off the kitchen (wondering what that smell was as I was getting breakfast), and asked everyone when their socks are supposed to go on their feet - "before we come downstairs for breakfast" they chorused back.  Well, no one remembered that little part of the routine so everyone went upstairs to the laundry room where we keep socks and got socks on, got coats on, got backpacks, got shoes on (some people strangely doing this in slow motion while I urged everyone along with increasingly less-nice urgings).  Then I realized Eliza didn't have her glasses on and had her go back upstairs and get them (much to her dismay - going ALL the way upstairs is so HARD.  Tell me about it - I've already done it like 10 times today myself...)

I sent the kids to hop in the car while I looked for the keys that I really thought I left on the window sill.  Turns out Ashton had taken the keys to the car.  I got in the car and saw that Ashton somehow had no coat on - even though I'm pretty darn sure I reminded each child to get their backpacks AND their coats when they headed to the closet.  Reminded Ashton for the hundreth time that we live in a cold place and we should always put on a coat when we go outside (St George habits die hard with that guy).  He said he was perfectly fine without a coat.  The temperature thing in the car said 11 degrees.  I sent him back in for the coat.

We headed out - just 8 minutes late.  In the car, we had a fun little quiz to see who could remember all the steps in the morning routine.  Eliza passed it off with flying colors.  Ashton passed it off too - but somehow KNOWING what he's supposed to do and actually remembering to do it are two different things.  We dropped Ashton off at school and then I asked Isaac to tell me the routine and he didn't answer.  We all realized he wasn't in the car.  Oops.  The kids in the back thought he was in the front seat by me and I assumed he was in the back.

We headed back home and found a very sad Isaac sitting on the back steps (with no coat - and it was still 11 degrees).   He'd been in the bathroom when we left.  I'm not sure how he missed all the commotion of trying to find the socks and get the coats and shoes on.  I guess he was in the upstairs bathroom since the downstairs one was so stinky. We all felt bad.

We got Isaac's coat and headed out to school for the second time.

When I got back from dropping off the kids, I saw that Ashton's gym shorts were sitting on the kitchen counter.  Glad I spent that extra 5 minutes looking for them.

So yes, routines are beautiful.  But when the mom gets up 10 minutes late and the reminders of the routine didn't happen the night before and someone needs gym shorts, even the best routines just don't quite work out!

At least I haven't received any calls from the principal - yet!

12th Anniversary

So yesterday was our 12th wedding anniversary.  I put together a video grabbing some of my favorite moments from the past dozen years as a little present to Jared.  It turned out to be quite an ordeal putting it together (I had to take photos of old photos and that was a process).  But it felt so good to put so much good stuff together in one place and remember all the wonderful things that bind us together - especially at a time like this when we're apart and things are hard.

The kids and I had a fun time making cookies, watching this video and talking about lots of great memories to celebrate the day.  Sadly, Jared had to be in Odgen so it was weird celebrating our anniversary apart for the first time.  But to keep things memorable, Jared spent yesterday evening in jail.  He got pulled over for having one headlight not working and they took him in because apparently when he got pulled over for having an expired registration on the car 2 years ago, they never received the check he sent in to cover the fine so there was a warrant out for his arrest.  Interesting that even though they've got our address and phone number, they put out a warrant for his arrest rather than letting us know they didn't receive the check.  Funny how things work (or don't work) sometimes!  Poor Jared!  He got things worked out quite quickly and was on his way again but it was definitely an interesting experience for him.

Rules You Never Imagined You'd Have to Make

I just got a great email from my sister-in-law, Kristi. Here's what she wrote:

I left the kids (McKay, 4, and Lyla, almost 2) for one minute to go feed the baby in the bedroom and as I sat down, I heard McKay screaming "Ah Mom! Lyla's eating the mouse trap!"

Me: "Oh shoot!! McKay please take the mouse trap from her!"

Lyla: screaming bloody murder, "Mine, mine, mine!"

Mckay: "No no Lyla. We don't eat the mouse traps. It will pinch you really hard!"

Great moment, huh?

As a mom, I've had to declare a lot of things off limits that I never would have imagined! "We don't eat mousetraps" hasn't made my list yet - but here are a few "rules" I've had to make on the fly:

• "It's not OK to try to flatten your brother's head by smooshing it into the ground" (I just had to say this a minute ago)
• "We don't try to walk on ledges with our eyes closed to see what it feels like" (or you just might end up with stitches in your chin - Oliver found out the hard way)
• "We don't say awesome things are dumb" (Silas just asked me to declare this rule in response to Oliver's response to something)
• "It's not allowed to do flips on the beanbags in the TV room when you have friends over because they could try to do it and break their necks." 
• "We don't eat things off the floor when we don't even know what they are." (I tried "we don't eat things off the floor" but that just wasn't realistic...) 
• "It's not OK to dump out all the pinto beans in the pantry."
• "Do not use Vaseline as furniture polish (especially on upholstered furniture)."

I do try not to say "NO" too often (read this great article about saying yes). And I try to explain the "no's" as much as possible. But what's obviously not OK to an adult, is often quite obviously fun and fine to a child. So the new rules and "no's" and explanations must go on!

What are some of the crazy "rules" you've had to make with your kids?

Moments

There are plenty of hard moments in our lives.  And there are a few precious, super-special moments in life.  But there are also lots of just plain nice, comfortable, lovely little moments that we should probably appreciate more.  Like right now.  Oliver has been sitting on my lap as I get Power of Moms stuff done and reply to emails.  He just wanted to sit with me.  I stopped to rock him for a minute and chat.  I love how he's still small enough to fit nicely on my lap and in my arms.  Here's the conversation we had:

Me: When you're a daddy, do you think you'll still come sit on my lap and let me rock you?

Oliver: Wew, when I'm a daddy, I pwobwy won't be in this family anymore.

Me: You'll always be in my family because you're my kid forever and ever and I love you – but you'll probably live in a different house and come see me sometimes just like we go visit Grammie. And I'll give
YOUR little kids hugs and treats just like Grammie does.

Oliver: Treats? When is it going to be Halloween?

Me: Not for a really long time. Halloween is far away.

Oliver: Is Halloween in a different city?

Me: No, I meant far away in TIME – it will be a long time until Halloween.

Oliver: Wew, where's the moon right now?

Me: It went down for the day. You can see it from the other side of the world but not this side right now.

Oliver: So is it night in another city now?

Me: Yep

Oliver: (really excited) Oh, I was thinking that all day – I just knew it!

Me: How did you know that?

Oliver: I just thought of it in my mind and it was true. Oh!  I can see the clouds out the window behind us right in the computer screen - can you see them too?  That's cool, huh?  (then he leaned back and gave me a kiss on the cheek.)

Nothing earth-shattering or super-special.  Just nice.  Really really nice.

I don't take the time to really drink in and enjoy these little moments as much as I should.  I can change that. 

Abba in Arby's

I have to share another funny thing that happened a couple weeks ago that I keep forgetting to post about. I love the little moments of hilarity or oddity in our lives - they're like little gifts from Heaven to make us forget the hard stuff in our lives for a little while as we're overcome with the humor of the moment.

Anyway, on our way back home from the big Bull Sale in Idaho, we stopped at Arby's in Pocatello (I really don't like much when it comes to fast food but I've found that Arby's roast chicken club is actually tasty enough to be somewhat worth the calories). We placed the order and I sat down with the kids and Jared's mom (who needed to go with us to SLC to get her hip and knee problem checked).

As soon as we sat down in our two booths, this older man in a snappy tucked in t-shirt with a choir name on it came over and asked if his singing group could sing for us while we ate. We said sure. He asked where we'd like them to stand to perform - since we were the only people in the restaurant, they wanted to be sure we'd have a good view. We suggested they could perform right in front of us - there was a fair amount of room in the wide aisle between the booths where we were sitting and the next tables.

Momentarily, about 16 teenagers showed up and moved all the tables and chairs in the area out of the way. It seemed like they could just sing in the aisle - there was room. Why were they moving all the tables and chairs back?

Turns out this wasn't going to be any ordinary little choir performance. These kids put on a serious Abba medley (Dancing Queen, Take a Chance, all the good stuff) complete with lots of dancing, different singers taking turns standing on a table to sing a solo, facial expressions to augment the meaning of the lyrics, the whole works. They must have done like 10 songs with serious choreography. And they did it all practically in our laps.

Oliver and Silas were glued to the show, nodding along with the music. To them, this was probably the coolest, highest-quality show imaginable. And the group was actually quite good - some very nice voices and greaty choreographed dance moves. But something about having our own private Abba show going on practically on top of us while we ate fast food was just terribly funny - it was hard not to laugh out loud!

We sure got more than we bargained for when we headed into Arby's for a quick cheap dinner.  Bless those singers' hearts (and their director's heart) for treating us to so much fun in the midst of what was otherwise a pretty long, crowded and uneventful road trip.

Thrill Ride

A couple days ago, I was heading into Costco and this cute little old lady asked if I could please drive the little motorized cart that she'd been using back over to the store entrance. I felt a little weird about riding that thing through the parking lot and on over to the store. But I couldn't exactly say no.

I told her I'd never driven one of those before and asked if I could just push it over there for her. She said she thought it only worked if someone was actually seated in the seat. She was right. So I sat down and she showed me how to use the controls and I was off. Sort of. That thing was just about out of batteries so it was S-L-O-W. And it was a very busy time at Costco. At first I was wildly embarrassed as all these cars had to stop and wait for me - what were they thinking seeing this girl who looked quite able-bodied moving through the parking lot and holding up traffic in an ultra-slow disabled-mobile? Then I gave up being embarrassed and just had to laugh. The situation was just so ridiculous. I'm sure lots of people were wondering not only what I was doing on the motorized cart but also why I was smiling so big.

I finally got across the street, got off that thing as quickly as I could and headed into the store feeling pretty silly.

But I was in a good mood for the rest of the day.

Sometimes it feels so good to laugh - even at your own expense! And my kids and husband got a huge kick out of the story when I got home.

You Can't Always Get What You Want

In our family, all of us (including me) often have a hard time accepting the basic but sad fact that you can't always get what you want.  One day, as I found myself telling the kids "I'm sorry, but we don't always get what we want" again and again, a certain song came to mind.  Since then, this song has become somewhat of an anthem around here.  

Whenever someone's having a really hard time with not getting what they want, we break into this little song and it helps dissipate the tension.  It's great hearing the big kids sing it to the little kids when they're on the verge of a meltdown - and to hear the little kids sing it to the big kids on occasion as well! I'll admit that there are times when kid facing some disappointment yells "I hate that song!" at the singer.  But in general, it works pretty well.

I really try to make sure people gets what they need most of the time and they want quite a bit of the time around here.  But we just plain can't get what we want all the time. And the sooner we can all accept that fact and learn to live with it, the better! 

There are lots of things I want.  I want more time to read great books and go on beautiful bike rides.  I want a husband who is just a tad more romantic at times.  I want laundry that does itself and kids that never whine.  I want floors that don't get sticky and covered with crumbs.  I want kids who happily obey me and even do things without being asked.  I want to be with my sisters more.  I want my kids' homework to be more meaningful and shorter and less tedious.  I want the other parents at the school to start volunteering more so that I can feel OK about volunteering less.  I want this saggy baggy twins-tummy of mine to disappear.  I want more great women to get involved with The Power of Moms so that I don't have to work quite so many hours on it to make it successful.  I want world peace.

I can make some of these things happen (to some degree).  But just like I have to explain to my kids again and again, "wanting doesn't make it happen - work and patience can lead to things happening - sometimes." (You've got to include that "sometimes" at the end - only in fairy tales does hard work and patience ALWAYS get you want you want.)  

I can chip away at getting some of the things I want and need.  I can read on the treadmill so I can couple my desire to get exercise with my desire to read.  I can model and encourage the behavior I long for in my kids.  I can work and wait and pray and help many of my "wants" become reality.

But I need to remember the "Serenity Prayer" that my mom had on a plaque on the wall in the house where I grew up: "Lord, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference." 

We've got to pick our battles.  We've got to choose our causes.  We've got to decide where to put our time and effort and money.  We CAN really change some things - and it makes me sad to see so many people who seem to give up too easily - or who never even try in the first place.  We CAN get what we want.  But first we have to decide what we really really want.  And we have to learn to accept, with serenity, the things that we can't - or shouldn't - change.

What do you want most for yourself?  For your marriage?  For your family?  Looking at your "wants," which ones are most important to you?  Are there some "wants" that you might need to let go of because they're objectively not that important or because they'd be more work than they'd be worth? What are you going to do to get the things you want and that feel right to you?  How are you going to dismiss the wants you've decided aren't right or aren't worth the effort?

Try singing it to yourself and to your kids - "You can't always get what you want - but if you try sometimes (and really think and work), you can get what you (and others) need!"

Michael Jackson Sings "Clocks" and "Power Rangers"

Oliver and Silas worked hard on a special show for me yesterday and I thought you'd enjoy seeing it as well. They break into this song that they call "Clocks" all the time but I think it's actually Vida La Vida by Cold Play. And this video also features a new song they made up about Power Rangers - it's snappy, it's simple - sure to be a big hit. They attribute the whole thing to Micheal Jackson somehow. Oh these boys are fun!

The Sweetest Little Boys

The twins are playing under the dining room table where I am working on my laptop on Power of Moms (it's time to really get going on marketing Learning Circles and updating the site). I love hearing snippets of their pretending. Here's what I just caught.

Si: Can I play with you? (in a high squeaky voice)
Ollie: No, you're a girl and only army truck boys can play.
Si: But I'm really nice and I'm tough. (high voice)
Ollie: Well, OK, I'll let you try but first I got to go potty. (then they ran off to the bathroom together)
Now they're sitting by me, counting the chapters in a book and finding the numbers on each page.

I was at the kids' school yesterday morning volunteering and had a couple teachers ask whether the twins would be at the school next year (I think they were calculating how many more volunteer hours they might get out of me if I had all my kids at the school...). When I told them they'd be starting next fall, I felt that little rise you get in your throat and that extra wetness in your eyes. My babies are turning FIVE next week. And they're going to Kindergarten in just a few months. I'll have big chunks of time every day to work on the many meaningful projects that are now crammed haphazardly into stolen moments. And I'll miss the background noise of these sweet boys as they imagine and play, breaking up my work with a quick smile. I'll miss having a warm body and cotton-top head wriggle onto my lap to sit with me while I type for a while. I'll miss the welcome interruptions of story time and I'll miss taking them for walks and bike rides when the weather's good and I've reached a good stopping place. I'll even miss the unwelcome interruptions of tattle-tailing and crying and needing something when I'm really on a roll with something that seems important at the time.

But rather than dwelling on what I'm going to miss before I even need to miss it, I'm going to savor this precious time I do have with the cutest, sweetest little boys ever.

Kid Quotes

I've been terrible about recording the great things my kids say lately and I've resolved to be better about it. So here are a couple of my favorite quotes from the last week:

While we were on a hike yesterday, Ashton randomly said:
"I'm not really sure how much I'm worth (I'm wondering at this point if he's having some self-esteem issues and where he's going with this...) but I think it's at least 5 cents because I swallowed a nickel one time."

Today as Jared and I were just about done talking about what we have coming up this week, Silas came running in and to buy us a couple more minutes, Jared said "Hey Silas, I'll time you to see how fast you can clean up those trains downstairs - I bet you can do it SO fast!" Silas happily ran off to take care of the trains and came back triumphant. Jared said "Wow, that was FAST! Now I'll time you to see how fast you can clean up whatever other toys are out down there!" He came back all excited to share how he'd cleaned up every single thing and was just so proud of himself. As I tucked the twins in tonight, I told Oliver (in Silas's earshot) about how Silas had cleaned up really happily and really fast when Jared asked him to. I hoped to reinforce what Silas had done while getting Oliver excited about being a bit quicker with doing what he's asked to do. Oliver enthusiastically said the perfect things, "I hope that tomorrow I can be just like Silas!" Sometimes my little plans actually work! We'll see how it goes tomorrow...

There have been SO many great/cute/funny/wise things the kids have said lately that I've loved in that moment but then have promptly forgotten. So I'm going to start writing them down much better. I'm going to bump it way up on my priority list. I have all these great quotes from Ashton as a little kid that help me remember what he was like and bring a smile to my face and I've slacked off big time over the years. I need to capture these kids of mine who are growing up too fast in every way I can!

Our Little Prizefighter

So this is how Silas woke up yesterday.

We're thinking it's a bug bite. He gets pretty swollen up with every bug bite he gets. It doesn't bother him a bit but we got lots of comments at church! Jared called him our little prizefighter all day and after admiring himself in the mirror, Silas said, "Hey, I wook kind of wike a cyclops!" Then he asked me if his eyeball was still in there and I pried his eye apart a bit to show him that it was indeed still in there. He was relieved and said, "Oh good, I was worried my eyeball went down to my toes."

Here's the little cyclops getting ready to ride a horse later in the day.
He's looking better today. Hopefully he'll be a two-eyed boy instead of a cyclops before too long!

Quotes

Oliver and Silas are at this great age where they've got enough of a command of the language that they are really fun to talk to and they can communicate really well - but they still have these super cute voices with their "l's" and "r's" coming out as "w's" and usually speak in a super-animated way. I love hearing how they express themselves and love how they integrate new words and ideas that they're still figuring out as they talk. Oh, I love these little boys so much! I look at them sometimes and feel so overwhelmed with joy and love for this surprise double blessing the Lord gave us and wonder what in the world I would ever do without them!

Anyway, I finally remembered to write down a few of the cute things they've said lately so here goes:

Silas at bedtime the other night as I tried to leave the room: "Wait! I need to give you a hug!"
Me: "But Silas you already gave me a lot of hugs and it's really time to go to sleep now."
Silas: "But I have to give you one more! I'm just so FULL of hugs!"
(He is so full of hugs. He comes up to me several times a day and says "big hug" and then throws his little arms around my legs. Oh, those moments make my day!)

After contemplatively looking around the chapel for a while during sacrament meeting, Oliver said in a very excited whisper: "Mommy, when I get big, I want to get the biggest, bluest scoopie (backhoe) and I will use it build more churches for everyone."

Silas in his prayer the other night:
"Thank you for Jesus to be OK after the cross. Please bless Charity on her mission to not be old so she won't die." (Silas has been thinking quite a bit about death lately after all the talk of death and resurrection at Easter. When we talked about how everyone dies someday, he got tears in his eyes and said, "But Mommy, I will miss you too much when you die!" I reassured him that I planned to be around until he was a grandpa!)

Silas went to open the door to the bathroom to go potty before bed and Oliver said "It's locked" but when Silas tried it, it opened right up. Oliver said, "Siwas, you're a genius!" No idea where he got the word genius!

More favorite phrases and activities for the twins of late for both twins:

• "dis singy" (this thingy) when they can't think of the word for something.
  
• "pwitty pwitty pwease!" when they really want something. It's pretty hard to say no to the cutest little boys with their arms thrown around your legs and their beautiful blue eyes pleading up at you and the most polite requests!
• "midnight monsters are comming! We have to huwy!" They gleefully get ready for bed with the pressure of the "midnight monsters" helping them hurry along. I mentioned one time when they were really slow getting ready for bed that they needed to hurry or these midnight monsters would show up and eat them up -midnight monsters are only allowed to eat kids if they're not in bed and they can only come out when it's almost dark. They totally latched onto the idea and love racing to get to bed before the midnight monsters show up!
• "wets biwd a spaceship!" They build a spaceship out of K'nex or magnets or furniture several times a day. They are SO into Star Wars and everything to do with space.
  

Last night we had the twins' beloved Sunbeam teachers over for Family Home Evening. You'd think the celebrities of the world had arrived when they showed up! The twins were literally doing summersaults and jumping up and down when they saw them getting out of the car. Brother and Sister Johnson (or "Sister Johnson" as they like to call the pair of them) are the nicest young recently-married couple and Ollie and Si think they are the greatest people ever (and they really are wonderful). It was so interesting to see what the twins felt they MUST show to their teachers. They showed them how they could ride their bikes with training wheels (they just figured out how to ride them proficiently last week - and Si has Liza's old My Little Pony bike and thinks it's awesome in it's pink sparkly glory. Oliver has Ashton's old yellow bike "Strecky" - it's still holding it's own!). They showed them Firehead the snake (and thought it was hilarious that Bro Johnson is terrified of snakes and DID NOT want anyone to take it out of the cage). They showed them how well they can jump off their beds (again and again and again). They HAD to show them the penguin soap dispenser we got for Christmas and that I can't put away with the rest of the holiday stuff because it's still a great motivator in getting them to wash their hands. They felt it necessary to show the Johnsons our master bathroom (which was a total mess). It's so fun and interesting to see what's really important about our house in the eyes of Oliver and Silas! Ollie and Si gave the "mini lesson" at the beginning of family home evening and talked about all the things Jesus created that they love. They pointed at different people to share what they loved about the earth and of course Brother and Sister Johnson had to share about 10 favorite things while the rest of us just got one or two turns. Silas' favorite things about the earth: cactus flowers, the ladybug we saw at the park, the blue blue sky. Oliver's favorite things: dogs and giraffes and all animals and lizards and the park.

Anyway, there are about 100 super cute things they say and do every day that I forget by the time I sit down to write them - but at least I captured a bit of this adorable duo!

Interviews with Little Guys

Si just came over and sat by me while I was checking email so I started asking him some questions. Here's the result:

What's your favorite thing to do, Silas?
Getting on a skateboard - dat might make me feel better - but I don't want to get on a skateboard because it's little and it's moving SO I want to get on Santa Claus's deers. Yeah - that would be so fun because they can FWHY! You know that?
What's the best thing about being a Loosli?
Best thing about the Looslis is ME. I am me. Write an S on the computer for Silas and one O for Oliver, OK?
What else do you want to tell me?
You will get sick if you eat too much of Jonah's candy bars - so I don't eat any more candy. I'm wearing my boating shirt. (He's wearing his favorite shirt - got it for $1 - says "A vote today rocks tomorrow")
What is voting?
You go to a building and get a boating sticker. Where is that voting sticker you got, anyway?

Oliver comes over and asks, What are you doing?
Silas: I'm having a innerbue.
Oliver: I want one!
What did you do today, Ollie?
I was just playing the puzzle of Mickey Mouse and we went to the park with the bike.
What do we do at the park?
Ah, we pway and stuff. We pway on the swides with Samuel.
What's the best part of bike rides?
The wheels - I like the twailer's wheels.
What's the best thing about being Oliver?
Wew, the best part of me is my head and my eyes too - oh, and my hair because I wike it so much.
What do you like about me?
Wew, your head and your shoulders and your knees and stuff.
What's your favorite thing?
Bubbles. Now I'm going to dwaw a picture, OK? A picture of bubbles.

Silas comes and takes away the pen Ollie's holding and Ollie falls on the floor in protest, laying there face down, sprawled in a state of deep and silent depression for about 10 seconds. Then he jumps up and takes off after Silas to try to get the pen back. Sounds like they need a little help working it out. Oh, here they are, back at my elbows, friends again - don't know what happened to the pen but it seems immaterial now. Now Si is singing as he flies a paper airplane and Ollie's getting himself a drink of water.

Got to get dinner!

Don't Buy Stuff you Can't Afford!

I just found this link on a friend's blog and it made me laugh - while making a great point that seems to have been missed by way too many people in this country!

http://www.hulu.com/watch/1389/saturday-night-live-dont-buy-stuff

How did so many people somehow miss the boat on the basic concept that you should earn the money FIRST and THEN buy the stuff. How can the attitudes towards earning, spending and saving be adjusted in this country?

I guess when our government is spending money it doesn't have to do things that may not be very necessary or effective (the Iraq war, many overblown and undereffective government agencies), the practice gets copied. And after the tragedy of 9/11 when the message went out that we could show we "believed in America" by shopping up a storm and flaunting the materialistic qualities that our enemies accused us of, that was a shot in the foot in many ways.

I'd love to see a government that could tighten up every aspect of its operation and set an example of careful and efficient spending. While I think it would be ideal for people to just decide to embrace conservativism with their personal finances, it might take government help to get people going down this road. I'd love to see a government that offered greater perks for saving and greater penalties for spending on "luxury" items so that people would have greater incentive to save and become more self-reliant. I'd love to see more education in schools about saving and spending. I'd love to see more warnings and information on debt - just like cigarette packages have a warning from the surgeon general, credit card applications should offer a warning about escalating interest rates and reminds people to spend only the money they have.

Recent Kid Details

On Halloween, as we rushed around to get out the door to trick-or-treat, I came back into the house to grab something and Ollie was right behind the door and I whacked the door handle right into him. I said "Oh, honey, I'm so sorry - are you OK?" Ollie was silent a second and then stoically said, "I'm OK. Spidermans don't get hurt!" Then later when we were running from house to house, Silas tripped and spilled his pumpkin bucket of candy all over the place. Oliver ran up to him and said, "Oh, Silas, this is terrible!" and helped him pick it all up.

After months of worrying endlessly about whether or not she wanted to have her training wheels taken off her bike, Eliza announced on Saturday that it was time. She's had them off before and learned to ride, but then fell and freaked out about it so she has really worried about trying again and we just let it lie for a long time. On Saturday, as soon as Jared helped her get going one time, she had it and was so delighted to ride all over the place with her little friend Olivia (who's been doing the two-wheeler thing for months). She still looks a bit wobbly - but she's really excited about it and pretty darn good at it. She rushed right in after school today and asked to go out and practice some more on her bike. As she headed out the door, she stopped to explain "Now that I can ride my bike like a big kid there's just two more things I need to do so I can totally be a big kid - read really good and stop being shy." Oh, I love this little girl of mine!

On the way to school a while back, I was telling Ashton he'd need to ask Daddy about something technical that he'd just asked me since I didn't know the answer. Isaac pipes up from the back of the van with "Mommy, you know, you're like the medium sharpest knife in the drawer in our family, huh? Daddy's like the sharpest knife and you'd be the medium one - like that kind you use you spread the butter." What in the heck! A butter knife! I've got to hand it to Isaac for noticing how very smart his daddy is - and remembering a phrase we learned when we read "The Tale of Despereaux" quite a while ago. But I had to point out that there might be a few areas where I could be the sharpest knife in the drawer - and the kids were kind enough to throw out a few things - "you're the best at making dinner" "you're the sharpest at reading us stories"...OK, I guess I've got some smartness in their eyes!

Ashton has a girlfriend. Her name is Keisha and she emails him about 10 times a day and calls him pretty often. I heard from Katie (who drives the carpool home) that Ashton's always off talking to some girl when she does the pick up and asked Ashton about it. He tried to act all nonchalant about it, but couldn't help smiling when I asked if he was hanging out quite a bit with a certain girl. He said he just likes talking to Keisha and that she's really nice to him but that you can't really have a girlfriend when you're eight - "like what would you do? It's not like you can drive anywhere together or anything?" But they do eat lunch together daily and Keisha asked him to try to wear something that would coordinate with the dress she was planning to wear to the symphony field trip last Thursday since she'd signed them up to be "bus buddies" (he didn't think this was such a cool idea so he ignored it). I went along on the field trip to help the teacher and it was pretty interesting to see Ashton and Keisha interacting. Glimpse into the future?

As I was getting ready for the ward Halloween party, wearing all black so I could be a witch along with all the Mia Maids (we were in charge of a booth for all the kids), Silas walked into the bathroom, looked up at me and said, "Wow, Mommy, you look budiful!" Maybe I should dress as a witch more often! Then yesterday, Si came up to me and said "Mommy, I weawy wike your ball hair" (I had my hair in a bun - like almost every day - but I guess it somehow looked extra good or interesting to him at the time). I like this trend of compliments from my little Si!

Oh, I love these kids of mine! They say and do so many interesting and cute (and challenging) things every day. I wish I could capture it all. I know the day will come when this will all feel like a dream.