Tips and Tricks for Moms of Babies

There are lots of "parenting hacks" posts floating around the Internet. That got me thinking about what MY best parenting tips and tricks and practices are - and made me want to record them to help anyone who might be reading and for my kids' use some day as they become parents themselves.

So today I'll start with some tips about babies that have worked well for me and many other moms I know (I've recently been talking with some friends with little babies so all this is sort of fresh in my mind right now). Then I'll do posts with my best ideas for other ages and stages when I get the chance.

Of course, these are just my ideas and my experiences. I'm not a doctor. I'm not an expert. I'm just a mom with 5 kids whose figured out a few things through trial and error and the help of family members and friends who've shared their experiences.

Getting kids to sleep through the night

Here's what worked for me (certainly different things are right in different situations but here's what worked for my parents and their 9 kids, for me and my 5 babies, and for pretty much all my siblings and their kids):

• The first few weeks, there's no real point in getting babies on any sort of schedule - their digestive systems are immature, they are getting use to their little bodies, etc.  - but we can help them learn night from day by keeping lights very dim during nighttime feedings and keeping things mostly silent or whispered (while in the day, we've got the lights on during feedings and changings and we're talking in an animated way to the baby while changing and feeding).
• About two weeks in, we'd start making a point of feeding the baby every only every 2-3 hours. She's often act like she might be hungry within an hour of eating (as a baby, if you're awake, the only thing you can think of to do is to eat, right?). A lot of the time, a pacifier would satisfy the baby's need to suck (most babies want to suck most of the time they're awake - it's soothing and fun for them - but they don't need to eat most of the time they're awake!). Sometimes we'd walk around, holding the baby facing outwards with an arm across their tummy (seemed to soothe any little tummy problems they were having). Usually, with a pacifier, some walking around, some changes of position, etc., the baby could make it for at least 2 hours and usually three hours between feedings, often sleeping for the 2-3 hours between feedings. I found that if I fed the baby every time she seemed to want to suck or seemed fussy, I couldn't quite build up enough milk between feedings to give the baby a really satisfying feeding but that if I waited at least 2 hours, I had some more satisfying milk quality and quantity for the baby. Plus the baby was getting used to eating when she needed nourishment, not just eating because that's the only thing to do! By helping babies learn to eat just when they need food, they will be set up better for sleeping longer stretches at night.
• About two weeks in we'd also start keeping the baby awake for about an hour before we planned to go to bed (for us it was 11pm so from 9 or 10 on, we'd try to keep the little one awake). We'd walk with the baby, lay him on his back and "bicycle" his legs, talk to him, dance around with him, read to him. We'd do everything we could to get his little body and brain stimulated and then tired out. After this "active" period, we'd dim the lights, do a bath if it's been a couple nights (not necessary to bathe babies every night since they get a sort of half-bath every time they have a diaper change and too much bathing dries out their skin), do a diaper change and put on pj's (while taking softly to the baby), feed the baby, then swaddle the baby tightly and lay him down (still awake, but sleepy - it's important for them to learn to go to sleep on their own). Then we'd quickly get to bed ourselves!
• Usually our babies would sleep 4-5 hours after establishing this "active time" then "quiet bedtime" routine. Then they'd wake up and eat quickly (and while we kept lights off or dim and kept things very quiet then), then we'd burp the baby, do a diaper change (if there was some poo going on - otherwise I found it was best to not do a diaper change - that wakes them up so much and diapers are generally good at wicking moisture away from the skin unless they're really full), swaddle the baby, and lay him down (with a pacifier - my kids loved pacifiers and that really helped them to feel soothed when it wasn't time to eat). Sometimes the baby would fuss around a bit after laying him down. We'd pat him gently, say "SHHHHHHHH" quietly, then walk away, trying not to go back unless he seemed like he really couldn't soothe himself - in which case we'd do some more patting, some more "Shhhh-ing" and pop the pacifier back in his mouth. If there was more fussing, we'd pick the baby up and see if there was another burp in there. But through all this, we tried to give the baby the message that nighttime was for sleeping and that eating and changing and picking up would only happen when really necessary.
• By about 2 months, our babies were sleeping about 6 hours in a row, waking around 4am for a a quick feeding, then going right back to sleep until about 7am. Then in the mornings, they'd want to eat a bit more frequently  - eating like at 9 and then at 11. Then they'd go to every 3-4 hours for the rest of the day.
• By about 3 or 4 months, our babies were sleeping mostly through the night - from like 11pm until about 6am. Sometimes they'd still wake up for a 3 or 4am feeding and sometimes they were sick or teething or had something going on that we couldn't determine and woke up every hour all night. But mostly, they could sleep through the night. They were getting the longer stretches of sleep they needed to really feel rested and I was getting the sleep I needed to be a good mom and feel like a real person!

Getting babies to take bottles

I think it's really important that babies accept a bottle for two reasons. First, it makes it so that the dad can be a bigger part of the newborn's life - eating is pretty much the world to babies and dads need to be part of that world at least sometimes. Second, most moms need to get a little time away from their baby from time to time, even if they don't need to go back to work or leave the house for solid obligations. 

Once breastfeeding is established (about a week in for most babies), all my experience (personal and what I've heard from others) says that introducing a bottle is not a problem at all ("nipple confusion" seems to be a myth - never heard of a baby who wouldn't take the breast when they sometimes have a bottle - unless they never learned to take the breast properly in the first place). In fact, the earlier you introduce a bottle, the easier it will be for the baby to accept it. After weeks of eating in just one way, it would naturally sort of freak a baby out to have this rubber nipple put in her mouth, right?

When my babies were like 3 days old, my husband would give them their first bottle - just a tiny bit - just to get them used to eating from a bottle - not enough to interrupt their appetite for breast milk. They'd sort of push the nipple out of their mouths with their tongues at first, then if we'd shake or squeeze the bottle so they could taste a drop or two of milk on the nipple, they'd get the idea pretty quick. Sometimes it would take a few minutes. We found that we needed to do this when the baby was slightly hungry so he/she would want to suck - but not super hungry or they'd just get frustrated!

Then every evening (or every couple of evenings) they'd get a little feeding time from dad - some expressed breastmilk or a tiny bit of formula or even a little water (I liked them to learn to drink a bit of water so that if milk wasn't around, they'd accept a little warm water to tide them over - very handy when I was driving somewhere and the baby was fussy but we didn't have formula or breastmilk handy - a little warm water would soothe the baby for a few minutes until we could stop and do a proper feeding).

Feeding "solids" to Babies and Toddlers

You know those "squeezable" fruits and veggies you can buy in those little pouches to feed to your kids? You can feed your babies the same sort of stuff with the same convenience, same lack of mess, and less environmental impact and expense by doing this:

• get a baby bottle with a cross-cut nipple
• use sharp scissors to snip that "x" a little bigger
• put pureed food or rice or oatmeal cereal inside the bottle (applesauce, veggies or fruits you've cooked and blended in your blender, or a jar of babyfood)
• feed it to your baby or toddler

My mom taught me this trick explained above - she fed all nine of us this way when we were ready for solid foods. I asked my pediatrician about this method when I first had kids and he said it sounded great but that it could lead to overeating and to children not learning to eat from a spoon if we weren't careful. So we were careful. And we did spoon feeding as well as bottle-feeding (spoon-feeding when we had time to sit the baby in a highchair and have a nice little social eating time together, bottle feeding when they needed solid food but we were on the run). Worked like a charm. And I think my kids learned to eat more variety of foods at a younger age when they could receive it in a more familiar form - a bottle - rather than having to deal with learning to eat from a spoon WHILE learning to accept new flavors and textures.

The bottle feeding method is also great for helping babies accept new flavors. My mom would put something the baby already liked - like pureed pears or bananas in the bottle first, then some peas or squash or beans or something they may not totally love at first taste in next, then top off the bottle with more of the pears or bananas. This way, the baby would start sucking, taste the food he liked, then be so into eating that he didn't really notice or mind when he got to the peas or beans, then enjoy a little "dessert" of more pears or bananas at the end. 

All nine of us are good eaters. We were never picky and would always eat pretty much anything placed in front of us. I think this method of feeding us solid foods as babies really helped!

Lunch dates, natural history, hiking and creative exploring - Spring Break 2014

The kids only had two days off school for Spring Break this year (four days total with the weekend) and Jared couldn't take any time off work. But we made the most of what we had!

As a pre-spring-break treat for myself and the kids, I took each of the big kids out of school for a special little lunch date on Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday (it was Restaurant Week in Ogden - great chance to enjoy wonderful stuff at great prices).

How did my babies grow up to be such big handsome young men?

 Isaac picked Tona - I was pretty excited about that - they do the best fancy and wonderful Japanese food! Isaac loves sushi and loves trying new and interesting things.

Ashton picked something a bit more tame - Union Grill. He went for the triple pig sandwich - bacon, roasted pork and ham. He was quite pleased about it.

Somehow I didn't think to take a photo of my lunch with Eliza but we had a grand time chatting it up and enjoying beautiful and super tasty food at Bistro 258.

Then on Friday when the kids were out of school, we explored the gorgeous new Museum of Natural History at the University of Utah. We learned a ton about the earliest inhabitants of Utah, Utah's diverse ecosystems, Utah's rich geological history (the kids love rocks), earthquakes and fault lines, dinosaurs, and chocolate (there's a special exhibit going on right now all about how chocolate is made).

Saturday morning, we had fun with the new tradition of string leading the kids all over the place to find their baskets and we all ate too much candy (the Easter Bunny comes on Saturday for us so that we can focus on the spiritual side of things on Easter Sunday). Eliza covered the string maze to the  baskets in her post about Easter.

Then we went for a family hike - my favorite really hard hike - Maylan's Peak. Oliver, Silas and Isaac were the advance party and wow, they hike fast! At the base of the mountain it was late spring with leaves on the trees and nice warm weather. We hiked up through early spring and on to winter. The last part of the hike involved LOTS of slushy, slippery snow but we made it!

 Beautiful waterfall of spring run-off:

 Early spring green just getting started in some areas:

 Patches of serious spring in some spots:

 Lots of snow at the top - the kids were delighted!

Great mix of spring and winter at the top!

Sunday was Easter and Eliza already covered that quite nicely in her post. It was a really lovely Easter involving watching great videos about Christ's life and death, eating our traditional eggs benedict for breakfast, going to church in our new Easter clothes (well, the boys just got ties and belts but that was plenty for them), having a pork roast and mashed potato dinner (we're not that into ham, the traditional Easter meal - why's it traditional? Anyone know?). We ate dinner by candlelight at Silas's suggestion (he was sad that we didn't get a chance to do our Passover dinner on Thursday by candlelight and wanted to still have that experience). We sat at the table for a long time and just talked, everyone bathed in that pleasant candlelight that softens faces and moods and brings out good conversation.

Monday I left it totally up to the kids what they wanted to do. They voted for a lazy morning of games and big tasty breakfast of crepes with fruit and nutella.

Then they said they wanted to walk downtown to the train museum, visiting shops along 25th street on the way and trying out some of the fun activities in the new book I got recently called How to be an Explorer of the World: A Portable Life Museum. We had such a great time exploring things we'd already seen many times but hadn't really LOOKED at carefully (the ideas in the book helped us do that).

 Here we are setting out:

 

Here they are down by the train station:


The kids climbed on the trains for a while before we noticed the new signs that said you're not supposed to climb on them. Sad day. That's always been a favorite activity. But luckily a lady told them they could climb on the front of the trains, just not on the tops.

On our walk, we looked for all the different words we could find and took pictures of them. We also looked for patterns. When we got back home, we made these collages and were pretty darn pleased with them.

Recently we did this activity where we found things in nature to match different paint chips we had (Eliza spearheaded this one).

There's so much to see when you really look! And art is everywhere. Beauty can be found in almost anything.

What lies beneath...

Sometimes being a mom is really hard. Like really REALLY hurt-your-heart, wonder-if-you've failed kind of hard.

I won't go into details but I just feel like I should say that even thought I run a website called "Power of Moms" and I blog about lots of great stuff going on in our family, I sure don't have all the answers. In fact, sometimes I feel like a total fraud writing articles about motherhood and putting on conferences about motherhood when I so clearly know SO little in the grand scheme of things.

But you know what? I'm trying. When things are hard, I think hard and pray hard and talk with my husband a lot and talk to the kids a lot and try new things and fail and try again.

I celebrate the things that are good a lot on this blog. I post photos and pictures of my kids' accomplishments and our fun family adventures and the things I've figured out that work pretty well in motherhood. Sometimes I post about really hard days I've had and stuff I'm struggling with. But a lot of the hard stuff isn't really stuff that would be good to share here. Some things need to be private.

And the more I talk with other moms, the more I realize that this is the norm. Every mom has hard stuff that most people can't see. We can look at just about any mom's life and think things look pretty darn nice. But under the surface, there are pretty much always heartaches and struggles - some huge, some medium, some small.

Just know that no matter how things may look to you, no one has a perfect life. As you struggle, know that you're not alone and that beneath the Sunday-best behavior and the smiling waves from other moms at school drop-off, there are hard things that most every mother is dealing with. It's not that other moms are trying to pretend that their lives are perfect. It's that they're often dealing with hard stuff that needs to be private for a variety of reasons so they're keeping it inside.

So let's all be gentle with each other. Let's assume the best of people while knowing they may be dealing with the worst. Let's realize that life is hard for everyone in different ways. And let's listen and love whenever we get the chance to really talk to another mom.
 

Fall and Halloween Ideas

It got COLD for a few days and I started getting sad that maybe we were skipping fall this year. But today is glorious and the leaves are in full swing of color so I'm feeling much better about life.

The kids and I did our annual hunt for great fall leaves and chestnuts the other day and we were very pleased with the results:

We think chestnuts are just so pretty - so many beautiful swirly patterns on them, so smooth and pleasant to rub, such a rich nice color... We put them all into a clear vase and made a nice centerpiece for the table.

The kids thought of the great idea of putting our prettiest leaves under the glass on our map table - and we keep adding more favorites.

April and I did a radio show about fall fun and here it is in case you want more ideas:

Plain and Simple Fun this Fall (We do these radio shows every week and have fun talking about whatever topic is pressing for us at the time - feel free to listen as you clean, exercise, whatever...)

And as we get ready for Halloween, I thought I'd share a recent post from Power of Moms that I wrote - includes recipes and costume ideas and thoughts on how you can handle the plethora of candy.

A Deliberate Mother's Guide to Halloween

I love fall!

The Habits of Happy People

I listened to a great Ted Talk today while on my run. Then my brother forwarded me a link to an article that nicely summarized the talk. The talk and article are about happiness, something I've been thinking about quite a bit lately.

Here's the talk:
http://www.ted.com/talks/martin_seligman_on_the_state_of_psychology.html (He talks about actual scientific studies they've done to "prove" what creates happiness.)

Here's the article by Kate Bratskeir that summarizes some great points from Seligman's talk:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/09/16/happiness-habits-of-exuberant-human-beings_n_3909772.html

Here are some of the 16 things Bratskeir says happy people do (pasted right from her article with lots of good links to further information):

They try to be happy. 
Yep -- it’s as simple as it sounds: just trying to be happy can boost your emotional well-being, according to two studies recently published in The Journal of Positive Psychology. Those who actively tried to feel happier in the studies reported the highest level of positive moods, making a case for thinking yourself happy.

They are mindful of the good.
It’s important to celebrate great, hard-earned accomplishments, but happy people give attention to their smaller victories, too. “When we take time to notice the things that go right -- it means we’re getting a lot of little rewards throughout the day,” Susan Weinschenk, Ph.D. told The Huffington Post in May. “That can help with our moods.” And, as Frank Ghinassi, Ph.D. explains, being mindful of the things that do go your way (even something as simple as the barista getting your coffee order right) can make you feel a greater sense of accomplishment throughout the day.

They appreciate simple pleasures.
A meticulously swirled ice cream cone. An boundlessly waggy dog. Happy people take the time to appreciate these easy-to-come-by pleasures. Finding meaning in the little things, and practicing gratitude for all that you do have is associated with a sense of overall gladness.

They devote some of their time to giving.
Even though there are only 24 hours in a day, positive people fill some of that time doing good for others, which in return, does some good for the do-gooders themselves. A long-term research project called Americans’ Changing Lives found a bevy of benefits associated with altruism: “Volunteer work was good for both mental and physical health. People of all ages who volunteered were happier and experienced better physical health and less depression,” reported Peggy Thoits, the leader of one of the studies.

Givers also experience what researchers call “the helper’s high,” a euphoric state experienced by those engaged in charitable acts. “This is probably a literal “high,” similar to a drug-induced high,” writes Christine L. Carter, Ph.D. “The act of making a financial donation triggers the reward center in our brains that is responsible for dopamine-mediated euphoria.”

They let themselves lose track of time. (And sometimes they can’t help it.)
When you’re immersed in an activity that is simultaneously challenging, invigorating and meaningful, you experience a joyful state called “flow.” Happy people seek this sensation of getting “caught up” or “carried away,” which diminishes self-consciousness and promotes the feelings associated with success. As explained by Pursuit-of-happiness.org, “In order for a Flow state to occur, you must see the activity as voluntary, enjoyable (intrinsically motivating), and it must require skill and be challenging (but not too challenging) with clear goals towards success.”

They nix the small talk for deeper conversation.
Nothing wrong with shootin' the you-know-what every now and then, but sitting down to talk about what makes you tick is a prime practice for feeling good about life.A study published in Psychological Science found that those who take part in more substantive conversation and less trivial chit chat experienced more feelings of satisfaction.

"I wish I'd had the courage to express my feelings," is one of the top five regrets of the dying -- a sentiment that hints at the fact that people wish they'd spent less time talking about the weather and more time delving into what it is that makes their heart swell.

They make a point to listen.
"When you listen you open up your ability to take in more knowledge versus blocking the world with your words or your distracting thoughts," writes David Mezzapelle, author of Contagious Optimism. "You are also demonstrating confidence and respect for others. Knowledge and confidence is proof that you are secure and positive with yourself thus radiating positive energy." Good listening is a skill that strengthens relationships and leads to more satisfying experiences. A good listener may walk away from a conversation feeling as if their presence served a purpose, an experience that isclosely connected with increased well-being.

They uphold in-person connections.
It’s quick and convenient to text, FaceTime and tweet at your buddies. But spending the money on a flight to see your favorite person across the country has weight when it comes to your well-being. "There's a deep need to have a sense of belonging that comes with having personal interactions with friends," says John Cacioppo, Ph.D., the director of the Center of Cognitive and Social Neuroscience at the University of Chicago. Social media, while it keeps us in touch, doesn't allow us to physically touch, which harvests the warm-and-fuzzies and even decreases feelings of anxiety.

They listen to good music.
Music is powerful. So powerful, in fact, that it could match up to the anxiety-reducing effects of massage therapy. Over a three month period, researchers from the Group Health Research Institute found that patients who simply listened to music had the same decreased anxiety symptoms as those who got 10 hour-long massages. Choosing the right tunes could be an important factor, however, as a happy or sad song can also affect the way we perceive the world. In one experiment where researchers asked subjects to identify happy or sad faces while listening to music, the participants were more likely to see the faces that matched the "mood" of the music.Click here for a few of our favorite mood-boosting jams.

They unplug.
Whether by meditating, taking a few deep breaths away from the screen ordeliberately disconnecting from electronics, unplugging from our hyper-connected world has proven advantages when it comes to happiness. Talking on your cell could increase your blood pressure and raise your stress levels, while uninterrupted screen time has been linked to depression and fatigue. Technology isn't going away, but partaking in some kind of a digital detox gives your brain the opportunity to recharge and recover, which -- bonus -- could increase your resilience.

They get spiritual.
Studies point to a link between religious and spiritual practice and mirth. For one, happiness habits like expressing gratitude, compassion and charity are generally promoted in most spiritual conventions. And, asking the big questions helps to give our lives context and meaning. A 2009 study found that children who felt their lives had a purpose (which was promoted by a spiritual connection) were happier.

Spirituality offers what the 20th-century sociologist Emile Durkheim referred to as "sacred time," which is a built-in, unplugging ritual that elicits moments of reflection and calm. As Ellen L. Idler, Ph.D., writes in "The Psychological and Physical Benefits of Spiritual/Religious Practices,": 

The experience of sacred time provides a time apart from the “profane time” that we live most of our lives in. A daily period of meditation, a weekly practice of lighting Sabbath candles, or attending worship services, or an annual retreat in an isolated, quiet place of solitude all of these are examples of setting time apart from the rush of our everyday lives. Periods of rest and respite from work and the demands of daily life serve to reduce stress, a fundamental cause of chronic diseases that is still the primary causes of death in Western society. Transcendent spiritual and religious experiences have a positive, healing, restorative effect, especially if they are “built in,” so to speak, to one’s daily, weekly, seasonal, and annual cycles of living

They make exercise a priority.
A wise, albeit fictional Harvard Law School student once said, "Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy." Exercise has been shown to ease symptoms of depression, anxiety and stress, thanks to the the various brain chemicals that are released that amplify feelings of happiness and relaxation. Plus, working out makes us appreciate our bodies more. One study published in the Journal of Health Psychology found that exercise improved how people felt about their bodies -- even if they didn’t lose weight or achieve noticeable improvements.

They go outside.
Want to feel alive? Just a 20-minute dose of fresh air promotes a sense of vitality, according to several studies published in the Journal of Environmental Psychology. "Nature is fuel for the soul, " says Richard Ryan, Ph.D, the lead author of the studies. "Often when we feel depleted we reach for a cup of coffee, but research suggests a better way to get energized is to connect with nature." And while most of us like our coffee hot, we may prefer our serving of the great outdoors at a more lukewarm temperature: A study on weather and individual happiness unveiled 57 degrees to be the optimal temperature for optimal happiness.

They spend some time on the pillow.
Waking up on the wrong side of the bed isn't just a myth. When you're running low on zzs, you're prone to experience lack of clarity, bad moods and poor judgment. "A good night's sleep can really help a moody person decrease their anxiety," Dr. Raymonde Jean, director of sleep medicine and associate director of critical care at St. Luke’s-Roosevelt Hospital Center told Health.com. "You get more emotional stability with good sleep."

They LOL.
You've heard it before: Laughter is the best medicine. In the case of The Blues, this may hold some truth. A good, old-fashioned chuckle releases happy brain chemicalsthat, other than providing the exuberant buzz we seek, make humans better equipped to tolerate both pain and stress.

And you might be able to get away with counting a joke-swapping session as a workout (maybe). "The body's response to repetitive laughter is similar to the effect of repetitive exercise," explained Dr. Lee Berk, the lead researcher of a 2010 study focused on laughter's effects on the body. The same study found that some of the benefits associated with working out, like a healthy immune system, controlled appetite and improved cholesterol can also be achieved through laughter.

Map Table

There are tons of big fat projects that need to be done on this old house. I keep trying to get bids on different things as we've saved up to get a few things taken care of (getting all the trim repainted, getting the yucky old paint off the pretty old bricks, getting the decks refinished, getting the old crumbing sandstone fixed up, getting backsplash tile up in the kitchen, finishing the re-mortaring that needs to happen to the rocks in the basement, getting a rickety chimney solidified...). But these crazy contractors come out here, look at everything, then never bring me a bid! So the home-improvement front (other than the backyard that we're doing ourselves) has been a bit bleak.

But I have been able to get a few small and very satisfying things done in the past few months.

Our new map table is one of those things.

I've been wanting to do two things for ages - make our dinged up old homework table into something better and find a place where we could put a map of the word with stars on all the places anyone in our family has visited. I was excited when I came up with the idea of putting a map on the table to cover up its imperfections and top that with a piece of glass to keep the map nice and make a better surface on the table.

It took me a while to get around to this idea. But one day this summer, that table was really bugging me and I saw a school supply store while I was driving, had a few extra minutes, and figured I'd go in and see if they had any maps that might work. They had a great map that looked about the right size if I trimmed off the corners a bit. I bought it for $12. Then I came home and called this glass place I see on the way to and from the kids' school and ordered a piece of round glass to top the map and table (it was more expensive than I'd have thought, but way cheaper than a new table or a nicely framed map for the wall!).

Then one week later, I picked up the glass and the kids and I had fun marking stars on the map (lots of stars across the US thanks to our recent road trip!). Then we trimmed the map and positioned the glass on top.

Voila!

I love that the kids get to think about the larger world a bit and remember fun family trips as they do their homework and I love that the table looks so much better and is now really easy to clean.

Big Backyard Project - Part I

Weekend before last, we FINALLY got some major projects we've been talking about and planning for moved along in a big way. We've been dreaming up exciting stuff for our backyard with our neighbors (we share a nice big area on the back of our two lots). We put in a little garden area last year but for the most part, the back area has been a pretty darn ugly place where the kids had fun building forts out of random leftover wood back there and climbing the one good tree back there. Last summer, they got into digging a hole together out there with their neighborhood friends. The idea came up to dig a hole big enough to put in an in-ground trampoline and that idea spurred daily teamwork on digging for quite a while. But by the end of the summer, their hole in that rock-hard ground wasn't very big and we tabled the trampoline idea for a while.

Then when we had to replace our water main this past April (read about that fiasco here), we had a guy here with a mini-backhoe and realized we could get that trampoline hole dug for a decent price. So we went for it.

(The twins loved watching the whole thing from the tree - and you can see one of the kids' many varieties of "clubhouses" they built out there over the past three years.)

It would have been much more expensive to have the guy take the dirt away so we had him pile it up in an area where there was an old foundation from an old house and where nothing would grow w/o a lot more dirt on top. It turned out to be a LOT of dirt. And that dirt hill became beloved by all the kids in the neighborhood. They molded it into a hard-packed mini-mountain and played on top of it for hours and hours, running their bikes down it, sledding down it, and even making a tunnel through it with a couple day's work. One little girl came around the corner, saw the dirt hill and said, "WOW! You have a DIRT HILL! You have the most awesome backyard ever!"

So to most adult eyes, our backyard was a serious eyesore.

But to children, it was quite a wonderland.

Then this past summer, horrible puncture vines really took over, producing thousands upon thousands of really mean burrs that went right through the kids' flip flops to send them crying into the house and went through bike tires, basketballs, everything. Those darn burrs made the backyard way less fun. And along with our neighbors, we started to get to a place with everything else going on in our lives where we could actually think about the back yard and make plans and begin to carry them out.

We decided to dig up all the horrible weeds for once and for all, make the dirt hill even better, embed a tube through it since the tunnel the kids had dug was such a hit, plant grass on it, get the trampoline hole finished, get sprinklers in, get sod, improve our garden area, put in some fruit trees and bushes, create some fun non-grass areas where the kids could keep building and re-building little clubhouses and balance beams and the like with some safer building materials we'd round up (the splintery rusty-nail-infested wood they'd been using - luckily with no casualties so far - just had to go).

I researched trampolines forever (I just have to explore every aspect of every purchase - I now know WAY more than anyone really needs to know about trampolines - especially rectangular ones as I found they are much safer and longer-lasting if you have older kids and/or anticipate there will be more than one person on the trampoline at the same time). I finally found a trampoline that seemed to have all the qualifications at at a somewhat OK price (they are EXPENSIVE for the serious ones with the lifetime frame warranty and if you're going to put the thing in the ground, you'd better get a good one that'll be lasting a long long time!). I got it ordered. Then almost 2 weeks later, I got a notice saying it was out of stock. Back to researching! Darn! I finally found another one and got that ordered. This one came quickly and seemed great. The kids started to get so excited!

But then we had all these projects that hinged on other projects and most of them hinged on renting a small tractor which relied on us being able to borrow a big truck from someone so we could bring the tractor to our house. Jared decided to grab the bull by the horns. He researched renting a tractor and learned tons about sod and found a great deal on sod we could roll out ourselves. He showed up after work on Thursday with a beautiful tube he found (it had been damaged slightly so it was in the recycle area at a construction place nearby). The squeals of delight as he pulled in the driveway with that thing hanging out of his car were priceless!

The kids had SO much fun playing in the tube with all their neighborhood friends on Thursday night. They'd all get in there and Jared would gently roll it around. Here's Jared with the tube (and the beloved dirt hill and not-so-beloved weeds in the background):

But when Silas somehow stuck his finger under the tube right when another kid rocked it from the inside, Silas got his finger squashed and his fingernail didn't like that one bit. It detached. It was PAINFUL. Poor boy!  He was so brave about having that sad little fingernail removed (it was only attached by a tiny thread and everything we read online said it had to go). And he's been totally fine ever since (and really good about keeping it clean). He was sort of excited to start school with his unique finger to show off (and we taught him not to hold up just that finger to show people - it's his middle finger!).

(skip these next pictures if you're squimish! there are more gross photos but I'll spare you those...)

Here's the fingernail just hanging on by a thread:

here's the finger w/o the fingernail:

After that casualty, we decided this was the weekend to get that tube safely buried, get rid of the puncture vine and burrs and get that trampoline in, once and for all. We didn't have a truck to haul the tractor but Jared got the rental people to bring it to us and spent all day on that thing while our neighbors worked hard to build a retaining wall to hold back the dirt in the trampoline hole so we could install the trampoline.

It was a long day of serious clouds of dust. I helped shape the hill with a shovel and get compost distributed around the yard (our poor dirt needs some help before we can lay down the sod). Our kids and the neighborhood kids picked big rocks and a fair amount of garbage out of the dirt after it was churned up by the tractor plus helped with other odd jobs (and loved sitting on the tractor and pretending to drive it when it got a rest from time to time).

Everyone pitched in to clean up trash and big rocks (and someday our back fence will be completely covered with creative graffiti by the kids- they started a month ago but then we ran out of paint...)

First Jared moved the dirt hill back so we could put the tube under it:


Then he plowed all the sticker weeds underneath lots of good dirt:

We placed the tube in the right spot:

Then Jared covered it with dirt:

While our neighbor worked hard on the retaining fence thing inside the trampoline hole:

The a huge rain storm moved in during a key moment as we worked against the clock (the tractor had to be returned!) and Jared and our neighbor worked right on through.

Then the first week of school was busy, busy, busy so we just left the project for a while. Finally this weekend, we had time to actually install the trampoline in it's waiting hole.

Here's Isaac testing out the trampoline to see if it needed to be adjusted a bit before putting on the pads.It was just right!

The kids and all their neighborhood friends have been on that trampoline just about every minute since! We gave all the kids a little orientation about the trampoline rules (only 2 at a time on the tramp, no shoes or socks on it, no neighbor friends on the tramp w/o first asking permission from us or our neighbors, etc.). And in the past couple days, the kids have learned all sorts of new tricks plus had 100's of "bum wars" plus had a great time just bouncing around. They're definitely sleeping well!

We're getting so much closer to a really fun and safe backyard! Now we've got to trench for sprinkler lines, put in the sprinklers and lay sod plus plant some fruit trees and bushes and maybe make a fun climbing area with old logs on the back side of the dirt/tube hill. So there's still work to go but it's so exciting to see things really taking shape.

Hopefully before too terribly long, you'll see a "big backyard project - part II" post. That'll mean we'll have grass back there and things will be much more "done." But what I've posted about here has been a huge huge bunch of work already so it deserves its own post!