Sunday, August 14, 2011


Do you see it?

Do you get it?

I don't either.  I have no idea why I've now found a full-on foot print on the stove THREE TIMES.  I figured since this was the third time, I'd take a photo before wiping it off.

Maybe it would make sense if there were any delicious foods stored above the stove.  But the only thing in that cupboard is salt and pepper and spices.  I can't quite see any of the kids feeling the urge to snack on that stuff.  And none of the kids will claim the foot print.  By size, it's got to be either Ashton or Isaac.  But neither of them think it could possibly be their foot print.  I guess it's Mr Nobody again.  That guy sure gets into a lot of stuff around here.

I guess I'll just add this to the long long list of somewhat odd and often very frustrating things that I end up finding and cleaning up as a mom.  I wish I'd had the presence of mind to take photos of some of the other messes I've faced - but in the moment I was just a tad angry and stressed and didn't quite think of taking a photo. Here are some of the most memorable messes I've encountered:
  • Basalmic vinegar and vanilla extract sprinkled gleefully all over the living room rug and couch by two very created two-year-olds.  Wow, that was a weird smell. Not sure why those two liquids were chosen together - maybe the fact that they were the same color and consistency? Quite amazingly, it cleaned up quite decently (with a whole lot of scrubbing...) and that rug and couch are still going strong with just a few tell-tale spots.  The smell lasted for weeks though... 
  • Vaseline smeared all over brand new carpet and the new Pottery Barn crib bedding I'd carefully shopped for and found at a good price on EBay.  In case you're wondering, vaseline DOES NOT come off carpet or bedding.
  • A little boy peeing out the front door.  I came around the corner to find a cute little bare bum framed in the front door with a considerable stream watering the front porch.  Lovely.  Another time, I found this same sweet child standing in doorway to the garage, similarly watering the old couch we'd put out there until we could find someone to buy it.
  • 25 pounds of pinto beans dumped all over the pantry - those things roll EVERYWHERE - but at least there was no permanent damage.  When we moved 5 years later, I found quite a few pinto beans tucked here and there...
  • Butter all over one of my toddlers - all over his hair, his face, the kitchen counter, the cabinet front where he found the butter.  He was shiny (as was the kitchen) for quite some time.
  • A masacred shrub.  My 3-year-old had somehow found the pruning shears and went to town on a once-stately, large and lovely bush in our back yard.  I was so relieved he'd somehow escaped injury, pretty impressed that he was strong enough to inflict that much damage, and pretty sad to see one of the nicest features of the yard reduced to a deformed disaster. 
  • Poo painting (at some point, each of my boys greeted me with big smiles and poo covered walls and hands when I went in to get them up from naps - some repeated this lovely idea a few times)
What are some of your odd findings and memorable messes?


richard said...

best post ever!

Eyrealm said...


Rebecca said...

So funny! Oh man! It seems like mothers of twins have the "best" mess stories!

A few weeks ago my kids sprinkled crumbled feta cheese (a huge Costco sized container of it) all over in one room. It smelled really weird.

Anonymous said...

one of my kids emptied an entire LARGE container of baby powder in his room during "nap time". When I walked in to get him, he was grinning from ear to ear - the whole room was dusted white andit was very difficult to even breathe in there. I immediately opened the windows and shut the door and gave him a bath,but it took hours and days to clean up that mess - baby powder is VERY difficult to vacuum up!

I called a friend to commisserate and she spent the entire call laughing! I never left baby powder in any of my kids' rooms since and am thankful that we never had any respiratory issues from that incident!!!

another notable one was a certain child who became fascinated in removing his poopy diaper during naps - that was a tough few days until I could break that habit (through difficult to remove clothes!) and he lost interest.

Cheryl said...

Duct tape around the diaper works wonders for poo painting....I speak from stinky experience! Oh the life with FOUR boys (I have them too and one daughter). I read a description of "boy" the other day, it was "Noise with dirt on it" (it could also read Mess or stink with dirt on it!). So descriptive...but I love them all stinky four of them!

Shera said...

Shortly after reading this post, I watched as my 3 year old stood on the patio table and "watered" the lawn. Unfortunately that is one small example of many.

Amanda said...

Max has managed to do quite a few of those in his time. The 3 that come to mind:
1)Urinating off my front porch into my flower bed. "I'm just watering your plants mom!"
2)Desitin all over his doesn't come out if you're wondering.
3)Red nail polish all over my bedroom carpet. Also doesn't come out.
Area rugs have become my best friend.

Catherine Bruno said...

I don't so much mind the messes as the broken stuff. Sunglasses - snap! Headphones - snap! It is so much fun to break things! Well, at least they haven't taken to smashing the wedding china yet . . .

Anonymous said...

Hi! That was great. I remember when my oldest daughter was three she poured out three bottles of kids shampoo on the carpet in her room. It took forever to clean. I have to keep shampoo up high even now because my middle child (who is three now) poured an entire bottle in her bath. At least she had a fun time.

SADACAD said...

I am SO glad I am not the only mother that had to deal with poo paintings and duct tape does work well! We have SO many stories like that (is it a boy thing? Where are all the girl stories?!?). One that is most memorable is my two youngest sneaking out to the trampoline with steak knives and stabbing the trampoline mat and seeing how long of a line (hole) they could make (ages 2 and 4!). I ran out chanting to myself "I can replace the trampoline, I can't replace the kids" because their lives were looking really short at that moment! They are still alive and well :).


Related Posts with Thumbnails